http://renovationtracker.blogspot.com/2010/05/under-construction.html) if you haven't already. And the past 2 days I feel like I've hit a wall. I just haven't been able to rise above queasiness, tiredness, feelings of weakness to have a good attitude. I kind of feel like I've just gotten over an awful stomach bug that's left me sapped of all energy and able to only eat toast and Sprite. I do force myself to eat "real" food. Once I take the first bite, it's usually ok. It's just making myself do it that's hard. Anyway, I've been quite the grouch (or "Grinch" according to Rhi) the past 2 days, and I'm really tired of being that way too. I feel very sorry for my poor sweet rambunctious kids who don't know what they did wrong!
This baby is a complete surprise for us. We've gone through denial (Wally decided it was time for a pregnancy test) and shock to planning and freaking out stages. I can't imagine having 3. And making the transition in January of all months. It sends shivers up and down my spine and waves of nausea too. My definition of January: cold, dark, month of sickness and depression only leading to colder darker month of sickness and seclusion. I really hope God will give me some excitement about having a baby in the middle of winter, but it's not happening as of now! Anyone want to suggest some positives? One of my friends said at least we would be heading into spring instead of heading into winter. That's definitely a positive!
We ARE very excited to see who this little one is. Especially since we were actively preventing, and God decided to produce this little miracle, we firmly believe God wants this little one for our family and has specially designed them for a purpose. We believe this of all of our children, but it just feels doubly so for this one since we were in no way asking for a child at this time! So, it will be exciting to see how their little life unfolds, who they touch, and how God uses them and us through them.
My first Dr. appointment is June 28th. I'm only 7 weeks right now. And we need to get busy! I feel like I have so much organizing and planning I need to do to be able to manage 3 kids. It's hard enough being absent minded with 2, I think with 3 life would just not happen. So I feel like I need a plan especially for exiting the house to either play outside or to go somewhere. Plus, we've perhaps unwisely decided to put Alden and Rhi together in one room. I'm a little skeptical myself, but hope to give Rhi a loft with private space underneath if she so needs it she can close it off with a curtain which we'll have to enforce with Alden. Yeah, sure, you say. And a twin bed for Alden and at the foot of his bed, a space for him to have some privacy if he so desires (which is unlikely). I'm also hoping to incorporate a little bit of pink somewhere on Rhi's side in a way that isn't obvious unless you are over there. She is just DRAWN to pink rooms in the kid's room books we've been perusing. Pink walls, pink curtains, pink quilts, pink feathery boas. She'd have her entire room in pink if she could. I told her since Alden will be sharing the room, we can't have it be "too girly". She seems to be ok with that.
I also really really want to get the family room floor painted. Isn't it silly how expecting can light a fire under your butt?
Flowers DO bring me cheer. Especially ones grown out of my own flower beds! These were used for a baby shower for a friend. I just had to end on a happy note.